Ass Sniffing Loser – $30.00

You already rank women by their ass before you finish looking at their face. You've been doing it for years. This file is what happens when you stop pretending you don't.

The girls you dated? You barely remember their faces. You remember them from behind. Walking away. Sitting on a couch. That's not going to fix itself.

I'll give you the words for it and then the words will stick. Every hardon comes with the smell already in your head. Every glance turns into a scan you can't call off. Try to picture kissing a woman. See what your head produces instead. That's the first few days.

You're an ass sniffing loser. That's not new. This is just the file that says it, in a voice you're going to have trouble forgetting.